A midlife crisis is a term that has become almost as familiar as the concept it represents. It’s often depicted in popular culture as a dramatic, tumultuous period marked by impulsive decisions,…
Do you wonder why do so many couples look alike? Apparently, it is just not happened by accident and can be explained scientifically.
It is a common observation that many couples seem to resemble each other, but the reason for this is not well understood. Some theories suggest that people are attracted to partners who have similar physical characteristics, such as facial structure or body type. Others argue that couples may begin to resemble each other over time due to the effects of shared experiences and environments.
Phenomenon of Assortative Mating
One possible explanation for why couples may resemble each other is the phenomenon of assortative mating. This refers to the tendency for people to choose partners who are similar to themselves in terms of physical characteristics, personality traits, or other qualities. Research has shown that people tend to be attracted to partners who share similar physical characteristics, such as facial symmetry or body type. This may explain why many couples appear to have similar physical features.
For example, a study published in the journal Evolution and Human Behavior found that people tend to be attracted to partners who have similar levels of facial attractiveness. The researchers conducted a study in which they showed participants a series of photographs of couples and asked them to rate the attractiveness of each person in the couple. The results showed that couples tended to have similar levels of attractiveness, with people rating the partners in a couple as being equally attractive.
Habits and Experience Together Make Couple Look Alike
Another possible explanation for why couples may resemble each other is the idea of convergence. This refers to the process by which couples may begin to resemble each other over time due to the effects of shared experiences and environments. For example, couples who have been together for a long time may have similar facial expressions or mannerisms due to their exposure to each other’s habits and behaviors. They may also adopt similar styles of dress or grooming, which can contribute to their overall similarity.
One study published in the journal Psychology and Aging found that couples who had been together for a long time tended to show more similarity in their facial features compared to couples who had been together for a shorter period of time. The researchers conducted a study in which they showed participants photographs of couples and asked them to rate the level of similarity between the partners. The results showed that couples who had been together for a long time tended to be rated as more similar compared to couples who had been together for a shorter period of time.
Bottom Line
In conclusion, while it is a common observation that many couples resemble each other, the exact reason for this is not well understood. Some theories suggest that people are attracted to partners who have similar physical characteristics, while others argue that couples may begin to resemble each other over time due to the effects of shared experiences and environments. Ultimately, the similarity between couples may be the result of a combination of factors.
The concept of gender schools is not widely used or discussed in modern education. Gender schools were a type of educational institution that separated students based on their gender, with the goal of providing a single-sex education. These schools were popular in the past, but their use has declined in recent years.
With that to say, let’s compare the pros and cons of having your children in a gender school.
Benefits of Gender School
1. More Focused and Tailored Education
One of the main arguments in favor of gender schools is that they can provide a more focused and tailored education for students. Proponents of gender schools argue that separating students by gender can allow educators to tailor their teaching methods and curricula to the specific learning needs and preferences of each gender. This can potentially lead to better academic outcomes for students, as they can receive instruction that is more closely tailored to their individual needs.
2. More Positive and Supportive Learning Environment
Another potential benefit of gender schools is that they can create a more positive and supportive learning environment for students. In a single-sex environment, students may feel more comfortable expressing themselves and engaging in class discussions, and they may be less likely to feel self-conscious or intimidated by students of the opposite gender. This can create a more positive and supportive learning environment, which can foster greater engagement and participation among students.
3. Reduce The Negative Effects of Gender Stereotypes
Additionally, some proponents of gender schools argue that they can help to reduce the negative effects of gender stereotypes on academic performance. In co-education schools, students may feel pressure to conform to gender-specific roles and expectations, which can limit their potential and hinder their academic performance.
By separating students by gender, gender schools can potentially reduce this pressure and allow students to focus on their learning without feeling constrained by gender stereotypes. This can perpetuate harmful gender stereotypes and limit the potential of students by pigeonholing them into gender-specific roles and expectations.
Cons of Gender School
1. Reinforce The Harmful Gender Stereotypes
One of the main disadvantages of gender schools is that they can reinforce harmful gender stereotypes. By separating students by gender, these schools reinforce the idea that boys and girls are fundamentally different and have distinct learning needs and preferences. This can perpetuate harmful gender stereotypes and limit the potential of students by pigeonholing them into gender-specific roles and expectations.
2. Exposure Limitation
Another potential disadvantage of gender schools is that they can contribute to the segregation and isolation of students, limiting their exposure to people of different genders and backgrounds. This can have negative impacts on the social and emotional development of students, as well as their ability to effectively communicate and collaborate with individuals of different genders in the real world.
Additionally, some critics of gender schools argue that they are based on outdated and potentially harmful gender stereotypes. By separating students by gender, these schools may be perpetuating outdated and potentially harmful ideas about the differences between boys and girls, which can have negative impacts on students’ academic and personal development.
Co-education Schools or Single Gender Schools?
There is no definitive answer to whether students learn better in co-education schools or single gender schools, as the effectiveness of these types of schools can vary depending on a variety of factors. Some research has shown that students in single gender schools may have better academic outcomes, while other research has found no significant differences in academic performance between students in co-education and single gender schools.
In contrast, co-education schools offer a more diverse and inclusive learning environment, where students of different genders can learn and interact with each other. This can provide valuable opportunities for students to develop important social and communication skills, and can help them to better understand and appreciate the perspectives of individuals from different backgrounds.
Will Gender School Helps to Prevent Free Sex at Early Stage?
It is not uncommon for students to engage in sexual activity at an early age. But will gender school actually helps to prevent it?
It is unlikely that gender schools, which are educational institutions that separate students based on their gender, would prevent free sex for children. This is because, the decision to engage in sexual activity is a complex one that is influenced by a variety of factors, including individual attitudes and values, peer pressure, and access to sexual education and contraception. Separating students by gender is unlikely to prevent children from engaging in sexual activity.
Overall, while gender schools may provide a more focused and tailored education for students, it’s unlikely that they would prevent children from engaging in sexual activity. The decision to engage in sexual activity is influenced by a variety of factors, and separating students by gender is not likely to be a significant deterrent.
Bottom Line
Overall, it is difficult to determine whether gender schools are still relevant today. While some people may argue that they can provide a more tailored and focused education for students, others argue that they are based on outdated and potentially harmful gender stereotypes. Ultimately, the decision to attend a gender school is a personal one that depends on an individual’s beliefs and priorities.
Energy drinks are believed to improve performance. Whether performance in sports or to deal with daily activities. But is it true that energy drinks provide an energy boost as expected?
Yes, it may be true that it can provide additional energy, but it is not wise to rely on energy drinks to drink regularly. If done, of course there will be bad effects that can appear on the body. What are the dangers of drinking too much energy drinks?
1. Heart Problems
Anything consumed in excess will definitely have a negative impact on the body. Energy drinks can also have a negative impact on health if taken excessively. It is true that energy drinks are made to provide an energy boost, but there are still limits that must be understood to not get a bad effects instead.
Caffeine is one of the substances that can be found in all energy drinks. Excess caffeine will certainly be harmful to health, but don’t forget that there are people who are also sensitive to caffeine. Drinking just a little can immediately feel uncomfortable. For example, problems with heart rate. People who are not used to caffeine should be careful when drinking energy drinks.
2. Addictive
Did you know that energy drinks can be addictive? People drink energy drinks because they are attracted by its effects, which can make the body energized and increase focus. Since it can give such effect, people want to continue to consume energy drinks.
Despite the positive effects, energy drinks are made in such a way that people can become addicted. Caffeine and sugar are the 2 main ingredients in the energy drinks.
Hence, you can easily become addicted to caffeine and sugar from these energy drinks. If you are addicted, it will be very difficult to quit energy drinks.
3. Anxiety Disorders
Do you easily feel anxious and nervous? This anxiety and nervousness problem must have a root cause. It is very important to find out what is causing the emergence of anxiety and nervousness. Is it from the environment or from the food or drink you consume?
A number of foods and drinks have the effect of triggering the emergence of anxiety and nervousness, one of which is energy drinks. If you feel anxious and nervous easily, consuming energy drinks can actually make your condition worse. Stop drinking energy drinks if your anxiety and nervousness get worse and look for other solutions to get an energy boost.
4. Headaches and Migraines
Have you ever had headaches and migraines? It certainly doesn’t taste good, doesn’t it? In order to relieve headaches and be able to carry out normal activities, taking headache relievers is the answer.
Aware of the unpleasantness of headaches and migraines, it is also necessary to avoid habits that can cause these problems to come. And it turns out that energy drinks can be one of the causes of headaches. The high levels of caffeine in energy drinks can give a person a headache, especially those who are sensitive to caffeine can experience severe headaches.
5. Weaken Gum Health
There are many habits that can damage teeth and one of them is by consuming energy drinks.
All energy drinks have added sugar to make them taste good. Energy drinks also have a low pH which can damage teeth. The more often you consume energy drinks, the faster your teeth will become damaged.
6. Blood Sugar Rises
Caffeine is not the only element included in energy drinks. There are other substances that are also included in energy drinks in order to make people who drink them get additional energy. The additive is sugar. That’s why energy drinks can taste good and sweet, thanks to the presence of sugar.
Many health experts have provided information about the dangers of sugar. Consuming excessive amounts of sugar can increase a person’s weight. Continued can lead to obesity and diabetes. Well, this energy drink can have a negative impact. At first, your blood sugar may just rise, but if your body is no longer able to control the sugar in your blood, you can get diabetes.
7. Fertility Problems
There are many reasons why a person experiences infertility. And it turns out that the habit of drinking energy drinks is one of them. Not only men, but women can also experience fertility problems if addicted to energy drinks. Especially men, energy drinks really have a high risk of lowering fertility if you get addicted.
8. Blood Pressure Rises
Energy drinks are very tempting. If you’re doing a heavy activity and requires additional energy, drinking energy drinks can be an option so that the body can increase energy and do activities again. But of course there are bad effects that can be given from drinking energy drinks.
When someone drinks energy drinks, it doesn’t take long for the body to react. Blood pressure in the body can rise in a short time so drink energy drinks. If you have previously had problems with blood pressure, drinking energy drinks should not be done.
9. Insomnia
No human can live without sleep. Lack of sleep can bring many health problems such as weakness, decreased immune system, easy to get sick, messy mood, and many other bad effects of lack of sleep. Given that there are so many problems faced when it comes to lack of sleep, then we must be careful about the things that can make it difficult for us to sleep.
Energy drinks can actually be one of the causes of someone having trouble sleeping. And if you don’t get enough sleep, the bad effects described earlier will appear. In order not to have problems with sleeping, it is necessary to control the consumption of this energy drink. Don’t drink too much until late at night so you can’t rest.
10. Caffeine Poisoning
There are several substances that are added to energy drinks so that these drinks can provide additional energy for people who drink them. One of these substances is caffeine. Caffeine can also be found in other drinks, namely coffee. If you consume too much caffeine, you may experience caffeine poisoning.
Drinking excessive energy drinks, plus you are a coffee lover, then the caffeine levels in the body become very high. There is a limit for a person to consume caffeine. If you consume too much caffeine, it will have an impact on vomiting, seizures, and an increased heart rate.
Autism is a term used to designate people who have disorders of the nervous system. This disorder can affect their daily behavior. Not only adults, autism can also be experienced by children. If the signs of autism in children can be realized early, there might be ways that can be done to deal with it. There are a number of signs shown by children with autism disorders. Here are the 10 common signs.
1. Always Avoid Eye Contact
The normal child will tend to look into the eyes of the person while talking. Unlike autism children, one of the obvious sign, they always avoid eye contact. You will notice they tend to turn their eyes in another direction.
If the autism child talk face-to-face with the other person, their body may be facing the other person, but their eyes will tend to look to the right, left, up, or down.
Difficulty focusing on one point is a problem that is happening on children with autism. Should you panic? Not really. Children with autism can be trained to be able to look into the eyes of the interlocutor.
2. Difficult to Communicate
Dealing with children with autism does require extraordinary patience. Not infrequently parents mistake autism with the introvert personality. The inability of a child to communicate is one of the signs of a child with autism but the parents are usually not aware of it.
As a parent, you should start paying attention if your child is silent for too long, even with their parents, it could be that this child has difficulty expressing words. Not only verbally, you can observe their communication skills from facial expressions, eye gaze, and body language. When this is problematic, it could be that the child’s communication skills are experiencing problems due to autism.
3. Developments in Old Learning
Most children who have autism disorders have long-standing characteristics in terms of learning development. This is quite often misunderstood by parents with weak children’s intelligence, even though it is not. Parents who have children with these characteristics are indeed required to have high patience to deal with them.
This delay in development, for example, is the ability to learn simple things such as personal hygiene. Another example could be the difficulty of the child in following the directions given by someone. Although each step has been explained in detail, children with autism have difficulty following these directions.
4. Sensitive
Dealing with normal children is definitely difficult, especially children who have autism problems. Children who have autism problems will show many signs, such as this one sign that is too sensitive. Not sensitive about emotions, but sensitive to sound, light, or when touching an object.
Children who have autism problems, their brains have difficulty in providing stimulants to the things around them. Sounds that are too noisy and light that is too bright can make autistic children feel uncomfortable, confused, and even frightened. There are even more serious case like difficulty in tasting foods that have strong flavors.
5. Repetition of Movements and Habits
Have you ever seen your child perform a movement or habit over and over again? Movements or habits that can be done can be such as shaking your head, moving your hands/feet in a certain direction, keeping the same expression over and over, or pulling their own hair. These signs are one of the signs of an autism children.
Experts divide this habit into 2 parts, which are lower-order repetitive and higher-order repetitive. Lower-order repetitive tasks such as clapping hands, moving objects, shaking the body, and repeating certain words. If the higher-order repetitive is like a routine that is carried out and accompanied by a very strong will. To overcome this problem, you can consult a psychologist.
6. Difficult to Socialize
At the level of children, they should socialize with the same age. And when there are children who prefer to be alone or in groups, they are the most silent children, maybe that child has a problem with autism.
It is already difficult in terms of communication, coupled with the difficulty of socializing will make the child more retarded. Autistic children tend to close themselves off and stay away from social activities held by adults. Adults perceive this child as a loner or introverted child. Before assuming a child is too quiet, it is better to try to talk to them and how they react.
7. Prefer to Play Alone
It has been mentioned above that children with autism have problems in communicating and socializing. The combination of these two can make it difficult for children to get along with other children. At school, children with autism will stay away from their peers. They prefer to play with themselves.
By playing alone, autistic children do not need to feel panic and difficulty when dealing with other children. They can play with their own toys and use their imagination. Not infrequently also autistic children who are too busy with themselves, do not respond when other people call them.
8. Difficult to Adapt to a Change
Children with autism need special treatment. Don’t get emotional when autistic children can’t follow directions to do something and didn’t do it well. Trying to change their habits won’t help them grow either.
Most autistic children have habits that they do and cannot be changed. When this habit is forbidden, autistic children cannot process it properly. Instead, they react by evoking feelings of discomfort, panic, instability, and even anger. For autistic children, doing something different from what should be stressful for them.
9. Sleep Problems
Children should get enough hours of sleep. Approximately, the ideal sleep time for a child is at least 8 hours in a day. But it’s different when it comes to autistic children.
Children with autism have problems with sleep or what is commonly known as insomnia. Just like adults, lack of sleep will not only affect the physical but also mood. Children with autism can also experience the same problem if they lack sleep. It could be that the child can’t sleep because the room light is too bright. Remember, children with autism have a high level of sensitivity to light and sound.
10. Difficulty Understanding Emotions
Many people think that autistic children have no feelings and that assumption is definitely wrong. Children with autism have feelings like children in general. The difference is, children with autism have difficulty understanding, interpreting, and expressing the emotions they see and feel.
Children with autism do not know how to recognize an emotion. Want it from facial expressions, language, and body language. They only understand the standard signs they are familiar with. It is not uncommon for children to misinterpret the emotions of those around them, even their own parents. It takes cooperation between parents, teachers, and experts to help autistic children in terms of emotions.
A school is a place to explore knowledge and also expand relationships. Generally schools teach many subjects which students must understand in order to pass the exam with a good mark. Unfortunately, from all the subjects, there are many important things that we realize that we weren’t taught in school, and our kids need to know!
1. Respect Other People’s Opinions
Respecting the opinion of others is important skill life that most of the kids learnt as they became adults. Nowadays, it is very difficult to find people who can understand and respect people’s opinions. No matter how absurd their opinions are, people are free to have opinions.
People have the right to express any opinion. Even if our opinion differs from that of the other person, we still have to respect and give them the opportunity to have an opinion. Even if it’s just kids, we still have to give them a chance to talk.
2. Rise From Failure
Everyone has experienced failure in life. At least experience at least one failure in life. Failure can not only happen in the world of work, failure can occur in various aspects of life such as romance, friendship, business, even in a family. However, not everyone can be patient and know how to get back up.
Children may not have experienced failure that far given their young age. But they can still experience failure in school and also in making friends. Do they understand how to overcome these failures? Not necessarily, since not all schools teach how to rise from failure. What is taught is always to move forward to reach the dream as high as possible, but it doesn’t take into account what happens when you fail.
3. Queue
The habit of queuing is still reluctant to be carried out by many people. It can be seen in restaurants, when paying, even on the streets, people are reluctant to queue.
It is necessary to teach the culture of queuing from a young age. Teach them to queue at every moment that does require them to queue. Make children understand that queuing is a mandatory and good thing to do. Even when you’re in a hurry, you still have to follow the rules.
4. Dealing with Stress and Fear
The number of problems faced can make a stress. Anyone would not want to experience it and some are even afraid of stress. The longer the stress is suppressed and there is no way out, the more people can run in a negative direction. For instance, alcohols, drugs, or it could be suicide.
Even adults can become vulnerable in times of fear and stress, so are the young children. In order to prepare the children to get used to fear and can face the pressures of life, it is necessary to be guided not only in the family but also in school. Most of the school think that it is not important to teach such thing as they are still young and they don’t really understand work, money, and other adult problems. It is at this time that teachers are expected to be able to help their students to be able to face fear, whether it’s in class or the teacher.
5. Take Care of Important Documents
Growing up, one must have important documents such as identification cards, driving licenses, passports, CVs, and many other important documents. Believe it or not, there are still many people who don’t know how to take care of these important documents.
At school, students may be told that later they must have an ID card, driver’s license, and a card or other important document, but are not told how to make one and where to make one. This information should be taught in school from an early age so that children can prepare themselves when they grow up.
6. Building Relationships With Others
Not a few who experience problems when dealing with other people. Connecting in the sense of not only with the opposite gender, but with the same gender also needs to be established good relationships. Difficulties increase when not only the gender difference, but the age difference also makes communication more difficult.
Communication problems with other people can be minimized while still in school. The teachers can invite students to not only hang out with their classmates in class, but also with those of the class above and below. The goal is clear so that when they grow up, they can deal with awkwardness.
7. Survival Ability
What must be done when the world is in chaos that makes humans have to live in the wild? Or take the example of cases that may occur, such as catastrophic natural disasters such as floods, tsunamis, fires, earthquakes, and other natural disasters? What to do, where to go, what to eat? The possibility of the world experiencing a precarious state like this will always exist, while not everyone is ready to face it.
Survival skills become the only savior of a person when a major natural disaster occurs. Not everyone has this ability because no one teaches it. This knowledge is usually obtained by reading books or searching the internet, but no school taught it. Though it is not only theory that is important, but practice is also important.
8. Develop Personal Talents
Every child is born unique, they are born with their own talents. But why do many children fail to develop their talents? That’s because from the school stage, they are not taught how to find out and develop their talents. They only grow and develop on the basis of the will of parents and teachers at school.
In order to be successful does not have always go through education. Who would have thought that playing video games today could actually become rich? Therefore, schools should not only pursue academic values but also find out the interests of the students. Who knows, the student’s talent will be useful to him later when he grows up.
9. Accept The Differences
We cannot close our eyes to the difference. The difference exists and is real before our eyes. What we tend to do instead of accepting these differences is to think that we are all the same. This mindset of all people is taught since childhood which is actually wrong and must be corrected.
Children must be taught from a young age that differences exist. Not saying that everyone is the same, but that differences exist and must be accepted sincerely. Some are white, some are black, some are in high positions in the company, some are not. Teach children to accept that these differences exist, instead of generalizing or even denying that there are differences.
10. Self Defense
Time is progressing, criminals are increasing. The way this criminal acts are also increasing. Not to mention the addition of the criminal who no longer cares about the age, gender, and condition of the victim, or can be simply more sadistic. So don’t be surprised that people nowadays have to be able to do what is called self-defense.
Children also have to understand how to defend themselves from bad people. Take for example the case of sexual abuse, many children do not understand how to take care of their bodies so that they can be used by criminals. School should add martial arts subjects to teach children self-defense so that they can be taught to avoid unwanted things.
Is it better to get rich slowly or get rich fast? The answer is simple: Achieving financial success does require a process that is often long and tiring.
An epic end result is always built through a series of long, consistent processes, full of problems and obstacles in the middle, and then tries to find solutions to overcome those obstacles. Not only end there, most of the people get stuck again because the solution fails to achieve the expected results.
Get Rich Slowly Shapes Your Character, Get Rich Fast Shapes Your Ego
The long journey process, and often full of failures and dozens of problems that keep getting in the way, is a bridge that must be tread with all diligence and high resilience, in order to achieve impressive financial success.
There is never a thrilling final result, which is achieved without consistent and diligent struggle. And there is never a final financial success that can be snatched away instantly, or suddenly dropped from the sky.
How The Digital Era Affect Us
Unfortunately in this era; an instant mentality that wants to success quickly is everywhere. A number of experts on digital behavior say that a person’s habit of scrolling through the smartphone screen every day is slowly growing the instinct to always get something instantly, just like when they are playing a cellphone (Mendoza, 2018).
Research on digital behavior shows that most people become addicted to smartphones because of the smartphone screen’s ability to build “instant gratification” or be able to provide instant pleasure.
Just by scrolling, we can instantly enjoy what we want to see, hear and read. With just a tap and click, we can immediately get what we want. With a smartphone in hand, it seems as if anything we want to enjoy can be present instantly. The power of presenting instant gratification is the key to why the smartphone product, with all the apps in it, has become one of the most phenomenal products in business history of all time.
However, the smartphone’s ability to provide instant gratification turned out to have an unexpected dark impact. The researchers wrote: a person’s habit of always scrolling through the cellphone screen, slowly trains the person’s nerve cells, to always expect instant results. Just like what you usually get when playing cellphones.
Digital Behavior Impact
Through the habit of scrolling the cellphone screen, this person’s nerve cells are slowly trained and encouraged to continue to hunt for instant gratification. In the long run, this reality leaves a grim impact: an instant mentality, or always wanting to get fit instantly. These things are slowly growing among many people, who are always with their smartphone screens.
On the other hand, digital behavior researchers also show the habit of many people who are always rushing when playing cellphones. Rushing means always jumping from one channel to another at a fast pace. Clicking, scrolling, and tapping, this pattern repeats itself every day. This kind of pattern slowly also trains a person to do something in a hurry, all jumping, fast paced, just like the habit of scrolling the cellphone screen.
The Result:
The attention span or the attention span of people who like to play cellphones is getting shorter. In just a matter of seconds, someone can move around enjoying a variety of content on their cellphone screen. A very short attention span makes most people no longer able to focus, enjoy something deeply.
Rushed behavior patterns and shorter attention spans make it difficult for a person to cultivate long and deep concentration. The fast-paced pattern of playing cellphone behavior makes a person impatient, and easily bored when facing a long and tiring process.
The unexpected grim impact of the digital habits and behavior of today’s young people. The habit of scrolling the cellphone screen that keeps repeating itself every day, turns out to leave the following behavior:
- Passion for hunting instant gratification.
- The habit of rushing and jumping around when enjoying the cellphone screen.
- Attention span is getting shorter; and difficulty establishing long and deep focus and concentration.
All of these impacts are inevitably the antithesis or formidable enemies of efforts to appreciate the long and tortuous process of achieving financial success.
On the contrary, all of these impacts will actually be successful in growing an instant mentality, which wants to get something quickly and instantly; without having to struggle to build long and tedious focus and concentration.
The Reality
Unfortunately, being successful is not as easy as scrolling the screen.
The process of getting rich slowly requires a variety of key elements that are sadly now disappearing by smartphone culture. The key elements to getting rich slowly are:
- The toughness to perform “delayed gratification skills”.
- The ability to do something in a planned, focused manner, starting from simple first steps, but is carried out systematically and gradually.
- The ability to build a long attention span; able to build deep focus, and can cultivate long-term concentration to do something that is often boring.
Those are the three crucial skills to get rich slowly.
Bottom Line
But unfortunately, as described in this article, these three important skills are slowly being destroyed by the habit of playing smartphones. In which, always rushing and searching for content that is full of instant gratification traps.
A dark paradox then emerges painfully: when the speed of the gadget is getting fiercer. Then, our ability to carry out a long and consistent process, becomes dead in sorrow and misery.